Beautiful piece, Katz. This really stood out to me:
"I don’t know what it is about turning 21. It feels like life throws a cruel rite of passage at you, announcing itself with a jarring intensity. A reckoning. It wakes you violently from the blissful ignorance of childhood, mocks your naivety, and says, “This is what it means to be alive.”"
And I started to wonder how much that sense of unworthiness is fed by lack of actual, supportive rites of passages in our lives. Our ancestors had those. Many Indigenous cultures still do. In their absence, we are left to fend for ourselves and to internalize painful life events as perhaps part of our own shortcomings, or at least how we deal with them. May we all find healing. Thank you for writing this.
I am in a practical and emotional panique and I can’t tell you how much “accidentally” clicking on something that meant I listened rather than read this made your words lift me on a whole other level. I almost like don’t have time to cry but oh wow are those tears on hold - the “of course I’m…” and “than our arms have ever known to hold” - fuck me this is actually helping me with some emotional practicals of my current panique too thank u thank u thank u thank u thank u ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
Oish 🥹🤎 you have no idea how much I appreciate you! The enthusiasm and immense love that seep thru your every comment is just so hard to miss or even forget. Thank you so much for engaging with me in this way.
And I’m also so grateful that my words did just that for you. Sending you so much love and hugs 🤗
This left a lump in my chest...it poked at old wounds that still throb when touched even ever delicately. One thing I am starting to be clear about is that life happens to all of us even the ones with privilege...and unworthiness seeps into all our existence regardless of how courageous and audacious some of us show up.
I am starting to ask myself often...what are you going to do about it? When the claws of unworthiness lifts up ready to drag you by your edges...what is your next best, right or available move? Do that!
And sometimes for me...it is sleep, it is talking gently to myself, it is crying into my pillow etc. do that and I keep doing that until I feel it flush out on my body, my mind. It is an everyday journey to embodying the worthiness that is already there and rightfully ours.
Wow AdeOla! This is such a stunning reflection 🥹🤎 so powerful and so moving.
Thank you for sharing that. And thank you so much for taking time with my words 🙏🏾
I love what you say at the end, the idea that worthiness is something we are always walking towards, not always an arrival. But definitely a practice that is so worth it.
I wanted to restack this whole piece. Every stanza resonated with me in some way. We're taught indirectly and directly to count ourselves out and play in safe in fear of rejection. I'm grateful for the season of life when I faced continued rejection en masse. It has made me stronger and bolder and allowed me to go for things imposter syndrome may tell me to shy away from.
Thank you so much, Ashleigh, for not only reading my words but allowing them to resonate so deeply. Your affirming reflections always mean so much to me.
I can’t help but notice how, so often, back-to-back rejections seem to arrive in the seasons when we’re already feeling the most vulnerable and unsure of ourselves. Perhaps these moments ask us to sit with the discomfort of not being chosen so we can begin to choose and accept ourselves first—fully and without condition. It’s a painful but profound lesson in becoming self-sufficient in our approval, so that external validation, or the lack of it, no longer holds the same weight over us.
I’m so inspired by the strength you’ve found through rejection, turning it into fuel for boldness and resilience. I hope this season continues to remind you of your worth and your courage, and that every opportunity you now reach for brings you closer to the incredible things you deserve. Sending you so much warmth and encouragement on your journey 🤎🤎
loved this vulnerable and wise share. this line especially: "And, of course, one can’t plant flowers in a war zone." I've been hearing a theme for myself lately. "find and create more fertile ground "
This hits home, as always. Recently, I have been sitting, staring at my self sabotage with disgust and wondering how much longer I'll have to battle with it.
Now I'm wondering where it came from. I was a bright and brave girl who did things. Now I'm a shadow of that girl and struggling to find my way back.
Which, I'm realizing, might have been my problem all along. Trying to find a way back to a version of myself that has been laid to rest, instead of bounding forward towards birthing whatever is new and wonderful and worthy of existing.
Because I am... wonderful and worthy of existing. Especially on the days when it feels quite the opposite.
Thank you so much for the welcome back Jodi 🤗 so happy to be sharing with you again 🤎
Do be kind to yourself. You have been through things, the years pile up, the experiences as well that happen and erode a lot of our innocence. It’s not your fault. Our light does gather dust but it will always be there, just waiting for us to sit and bring it out again.
So I know with you too that young Jodi is still there.
So wherever you are right now, you are worthy, always 🤎
Beautiful piece, Katz. This really stood out to me:
"I don’t know what it is about turning 21. It feels like life throws a cruel rite of passage at you, announcing itself with a jarring intensity. A reckoning. It wakes you violently from the blissful ignorance of childhood, mocks your naivety, and says, “This is what it means to be alive.”"
And I started to wonder how much that sense of unworthiness is fed by lack of actual, supportive rites of passages in our lives. Our ancestors had those. Many Indigenous cultures still do. In their absence, we are left to fend for ourselves and to internalize painful life events as perhaps part of our own shortcomings, or at least how we deal with them. May we all find healing. Thank you for writing this.
I am in a practical and emotional panique and I can’t tell you how much “accidentally” clicking on something that meant I listened rather than read this made your words lift me on a whole other level. I almost like don’t have time to cry but oh wow are those tears on hold - the “of course I’m…” and “than our arms have ever known to hold” - fuck me this is actually helping me with some emotional practicals of my current panique too thank u thank u thank u thank u thank u ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
Oish 🥹🤎 you have no idea how much I appreciate you! The enthusiasm and immense love that seep thru your every comment is just so hard to miss or even forget. Thank you so much for engaging with me in this way.
And I’m also so grateful that my words did just that for you. Sending you so much love and hugs 🤗
This left a lump in my chest...it poked at old wounds that still throb when touched even ever delicately. One thing I am starting to be clear about is that life happens to all of us even the ones with privilege...and unworthiness seeps into all our existence regardless of how courageous and audacious some of us show up.
I am starting to ask myself often...what are you going to do about it? When the claws of unworthiness lifts up ready to drag you by your edges...what is your next best, right or available move? Do that!
And sometimes for me...it is sleep, it is talking gently to myself, it is crying into my pillow etc. do that and I keep doing that until I feel it flush out on my body, my mind. It is an everyday journey to embodying the worthiness that is already there and rightfully ours.
Wow AdeOla! This is such a stunning reflection 🥹🤎 so powerful and so moving.
Thank you for sharing that. And thank you so much for taking time with my words 🙏🏾
I love what you say at the end, the idea that worthiness is something we are always walking towards, not always an arrival. But definitely a practice that is so worth it.
Sending you all my love 🫂
You are welcome 🙏🏾 🩵
I wanted to restack this whole piece. Every stanza resonated with me in some way. We're taught indirectly and directly to count ourselves out and play in safe in fear of rejection. I'm grateful for the season of life when I faced continued rejection en masse. It has made me stronger and bolder and allowed me to go for things imposter syndrome may tell me to shy away from.
Thank you so much, Ashleigh, for not only reading my words but allowing them to resonate so deeply. Your affirming reflections always mean so much to me.
I can’t help but notice how, so often, back-to-back rejections seem to arrive in the seasons when we’re already feeling the most vulnerable and unsure of ourselves. Perhaps these moments ask us to sit with the discomfort of not being chosen so we can begin to choose and accept ourselves first—fully and without condition. It’s a painful but profound lesson in becoming self-sufficient in our approval, so that external validation, or the lack of it, no longer holds the same weight over us.
I’m so inspired by the strength you’ve found through rejection, turning it into fuel for boldness and resilience. I hope this season continues to remind you of your worth and your courage, and that every opportunity you now reach for brings you closer to the incredible things you deserve. Sending you so much warmth and encouragement on your journey 🤎🤎
I see unworthiness exiting the chat.
Thank you❤️
P.S. I love your bio so much! So resonant and poignant 🤎🤎🤎
Yesss to this and love it for us 🙌🏾🤎
Only my pleasure Nadia 🥹🤎
And thank you to you too for taking the time with my words 🌻✨
What a powerful and light filled reminder. I felt this piece so deep in my bones. Thank you for sharing 🤍🤍🤍
Sheesh! Thank you so much for this comment Krista and taking time to take in my words 🤎🤎
loved this vulnerable and wise share. this line especially: "And, of course, one can’t plant flowers in a war zone." I've been hearing a theme for myself lately. "find and create more fertile ground "
Thank you so much Megan for taking the time with my words and affirming them 🤎
And I love that word! It also feels true for me too. So here's to a more expansive life with so much fertile ground for us to stand on 🌻✨️
together friend. SO glad you wrote.
Thank you so much Megan for affirming this experience. I appreciate you commenting and sitting with my words. 🤎
Welcome back.
This hits home, as always. Recently, I have been sitting, staring at my self sabotage with disgust and wondering how much longer I'll have to battle with it.
Now I'm wondering where it came from. I was a bright and brave girl who did things. Now I'm a shadow of that girl and struggling to find my way back.
Which, I'm realizing, might have been my problem all along. Trying to find a way back to a version of myself that has been laid to rest, instead of bounding forward towards birthing whatever is new and wonderful and worthy of existing.
Because I am... wonderful and worthy of existing. Especially on the days when it feels quite the opposite.
Thank you so much for the welcome back Jodi 🤗 so happy to be sharing with you again 🤎
Do be kind to yourself. You have been through things, the years pile up, the experiences as well that happen and erode a lot of our innocence. It’s not your fault. Our light does gather dust but it will always be there, just waiting for us to sit and bring it out again.
So I know with you too that young Jodi is still there.
So wherever you are right now, you are worthy, always 🤎
Words like this is so helpful in unlearning the negativity that takes up the space of good things.
And it’s not an overnight process and one that I hope we will always be kind and gracious to ourselves with.
Thank you always Lezel for reading and commenting 🤗🤎
Maia, this is so incredible. This perspective is so liberating in a way that I can’t yet explain.
And thank you so much for illuminating this conversation in such a manner and taking time with my words.
Wow!
Thank you so much for writing. Today especially, I needed to hear this❤️
Only my pleasure Amba 🤎 I am so grateful that my words came when you needed them most.
Thank you to you too for taking the time to take in my words.
Much love 🌻
I could have wrote this. Thank you for bringing so much clarity to the way our baggage can nearly destroy us.